This is taken from an anonymous Internet post…….

1. No flight ever leaves on time unless you are running late and need the delay to make the flight.
2. If you’re running late for a flight, it will depart from the farthest gate within the terminal.
3. If you arrive very early for a flight, it will inevitably be delayed.
4. Flights never leave from Gate #1 at any terminal in the world.
5. If you work on your flight, you’ll experience turbulence as soon as you touch pen to paper ……. or start to drink your coffee.
6. If you’re assigned a middle seat, you can determine who has the seats either side of you while you are still in the boarding area; Just look for the two largest passengers.
7. Only passengers seated in window seats ever have to get up to use the lavatory.
8. The crying baby on board your flight is always seated next to you.
9. The best-looking man/woman on your flight is never seated next to you.
10. The less carry-on luggage space available on an aircraft, the more carry-on luggage passengers will bring aboard.

Of course – this is a joke. But, I can vouch for rule number 5 and 10! Rule number 1 I can say is not true as 80% of the 3000 flights I’ve operated have left on time. That’s just an estimate – I haven’t actually sat down and worked that out!!!!

Anyone else have any rules to add to the list?! I’d love to hear them…..

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